Tuesday, May 15, 2012


Ahhh...I just had to share this amazing little song called "Swim".   I know the bells are a little cheesy but I just love it and it makes me think of Jacob and all he's been through!

This is really silly, but there were so many days when we were in the hospital together that I just had to thank Dori from "Finding Nemo" for her words of advice..., "Just keep swimming!"  I love it, so simple and yet so deep.   Nowadays, I just have to add that I really relate to Dori because I can't remember from one minute to the next sometimes! My brain just doesn't work like it used to. I'm so stinkin' forgetful and absent minded and sometimes I know my kids (and my husband) think I'm crazy.  Jacob laughs at me so much (I'm so glad he laughs...never gets frustrated or mad at me...ever) But he laughs just watching me walk around his room sometimes trying to remember what I came down to do or what we need to do next.  Did I remember to put on the little toe sticky to monitor his oxygen while he sleeps?  Did I remember to turn on the oxygen machine? Did you take your pills, did you get the IV medicine hooked up for the night, got enough water? ...how much did you drink today anyway???...not enough, drink some more! What else Jacob...don't let me forget.  Hahaha...ya it's funny sometimes.

But that's not what this song is about.  It's about Jacob and swimming for his life, keeping his head above water.  And, I love that it's about swimming because boy does he ever love to swim!  He was a little fish from the first time we put him in the water...at 2 weeks old! He loved it.  Nowadays, well, he misses it more than anything in his life that he had to give up for cancer.  It's been long over a year now since he's been able to swim and it's just driving him crazy.  He wants more than anything in the world...even riding that dirtbike, to be able to swim again.  I'll never ever forget the day he found out how long...really how long he would have to wait for them to take his "line" out of his heart and be able to get into water again.  The nurse asked, what kind of cancer is it again?  And you're headed for the bone marrow transplant? Ya, well then I would guess at least a year.  "A Year?" he asked. I'll never forget the look in his eyes as he told him he couldn't swim until it was out.  How he fought back the tears as the reality set in.  I'll never forget it, and it broke my heart. 

The cool thing that I realized is that I really think that swimming will be the one thing he'll be able to do best when this is all over and he's better.  Running may be hard for a while on his tender knees and joints, football will be tough getting back to, riding the dirtbike...well, that just scares me.  But swimming...it will be so good for him, I can't wait!  Just can't wait to see him jump off a dock somewhere or swing off a long ropeswing, dive off the high dive and just ...swim.

Can't wait for summer - and for that crazy tube to his heart with two little lines and their ugly caps to be taken out of his body so he can get more than his feet wet in life again!

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Thank you so much for reading our story. It means so much to me that people care enough to follow us and share in our journey through Jacob's treatment and recovery. Please know that I read every comment and I treasure every one! I may not have time to comment back, but I will keep writing and sharing our story.